the gift

77/365: the gift
Originally uploaded by butta.fly

i told my coworker months ago that i wanted a vintage swimcap with flowers on it so i could start swimming again. she found a company that still makes them and bought me one for christmas. i love it so much! i've been walking around the office today with it on (off and on because it squeezes my head). anyway, i'm having fun today. why not? it's friday!

merry christmas to you all. enjoy your family & friends!
peace love & blessings!

listening to: this american life podcast

i've been cooking a lot and bring my lunch to work. today's lunch was leftover potato latkes (from veganomicon), kale greens, and cashew hummus w/ carrots for dipping. yum! i've overcome my fear of cooking from cookbooks. i guess i've been saying this a lot lately, but i feel so empowered cooking wonderful meals for myself and my family.

my birthday is coming up and i've been thinking about what i'm going to do to celebrate. the last couple of years i've gone to dinner with friends. this time i think i'm just going to spend a quiet night at home. i do have a massage scheduled and plan on taking a yoga class. that day is going to be about taking care of me. i can't wait!

love & light

i have survived my first semester of school!

i took my last final yesterday and i almost ran out of that building once i was finished. i feel so relieved. now i can focus on other things.

crocheting is my first love, but there is something about knitting that really grounds me. i don't know what it is really. i started knitting a hat in the round yesterday and it felt like coming home. i gotta find time to knit more.

last weekend, i reorganized my pantry and was horrified at the amount of plastic bags i have accumulated over the years (three to be exact). my mom wanted me to throw them away, but i told her i couldn't do that. i just can't. it drives me crazy to be driving and then see plastic bags caught on trees.

so, what should i do with them? cut them up and crochet reusuable shopping bags? make a rug? i will have to think about it for a while.

love=creatures baby

love=creatures baby
Originally uploaded by butta.fly

i understand now why people love plush toys so much. i ordered these beautiful babies from dawn at lookwhaticando.etsy.com. i've been looking at her creatures for a while now and decided to give lil miss the elephant for christmas. the rabbit is an early birthday present for myself. dawn does outstanding work. check her out when you get a chance.

(lil miss LOVES stuffed animals. she's going to go nuts when she sees this elephant.)

listening to: andromeda & the milky way.me'shell ndegeocello

i think i could listen to me'shell's voice forever and always.

for dinner last night, i made black bean vegetable soup and skillet cornbread from veganomicon. it was good. i'm learning a lot these days about using what's in my pantry. i'm no longer afraid to cook dry beans and i'm willing to experiment more.

i have a date with johnny tonite (depp that is). i've been waiting all week to watch pirates of the caribbean: at world's end.

hope your day is fabulous.

blue dress

blue dress
Originally uploaded by butta.fly

i was so happy to find this dress the other day. i love peasant dresses and wish i had more. anyway, this was a great way to inject some color in my dark, cold day (and boy was it cold!). i wore a dark denim skirt underneath with tights. i need to add some legwarmers to the wardrobe .

it's crunch time!

i'm currently sitting in a computer lab at school taking a quick blogging break. my brain is fried yo! i'm still playing catch up with my essay writing. next semester, i will hunker down and get my damn work done. this shit ain't cool at all.

while working i realized i really need some fingerless mitts in my life. i'm sitting near the door and all of the cold air is rushing in. i can't type with cold hands, so i think i will make some over the weekend.

the craft fair was a success! i made eight flower skullies and sold all but one. now i gotta get my christmas gift making done. my dad is getting some socks and my bros and nephew are getting hats. i'm still figuring out what i'm making moms and sis. they'll be happy with anything i decide.

it's colder than a witch's titty outside (ha, my older friend's term). i need a new hat.

now back to essay writing...

listening to: discovery.muhsinah

the semester is coming close to the end. i'm behind in my writing class (still!), but after getting rave reviews on my latest essay, i'm fired up and ready to finish the rest of my work. i basically have 8 papers to write between now and next wednesday. luckily, they're all 5 paragraph essays, so it shouldn't take me long to complete.

my last craft fair of the season/year is this saturday. i've been buying display items and planning how i'm going to best use my space. if only i had the room in my apartment to do a "booth dress rehearsal". i'm not freaking out about it anymore, but i did have some crazy pre-show jitters last week.

i'm currently reading the artist's way (my third attempt). i've heard from other creative folks how much this book has benefitted them. my friend z and i are working thru it together. so far, so good. we're on week two. i've been contemplating what i'm doing for my artist date this week. lord knows i don't have much time to do any recreational sewing, but sewing kept popping up into my head. i want to start my builty by wendy dress. i've never cut out a pattern before and that's been holding me back all of this time. i'd really like to wear it on christmas day.

listening to: sun ra:"cosmic swing".npr jazz profiles podcast

how was your holiday? mine was cool. i spent it with my fam. i had a nice talk with my parents and attempted to make some vegan goodness for my oldest daughter. i had envisioned this tasty meal with her eating every bite. that didn't happen. i cooked the smokey grilled tempeh, sauteed collards (actually spinach), and cheater baked beans from veganomicon: the ultimate vegan cookbook. the tempeh was bitter and not good at all (it was my first time cooking/eating tempeh - i ended up cooking tofu instead), the spinach was okay, and the beans had too much garlic in them (i must use regular tomato sauce next time). overall, the meal was eatable (minus the tempeh) but it just wasn't spectacular like i was hoping. that's the way it goes sometimes. my kitchen is about to be turned into a test kitchen. i'm going to experiment with the recipes in vcon and others i have.

last night i prepared the veggie burger mix from vegan with a vengeance and cooked up a couple patties this morn. that's my lunch today and i can't wait to dig in (these are good!). i'm not giving up on tempeh just yet. i just have to find the right recipe for it.

enjoy the day!

flower

flower
Originally uploaded by butta.fly

the picture is a little blurry (took it with my cameraphone), but i absolutely love how this brooch turned out. i think i'm going to add big flower brooches to my wardrobe.

hair wrap

hair wrap
Originally uploaded by butta.fly

listening to: ask yourself.raheem devaughn



i am so excited by the responses i received to my previous post! even though i know people are reading this here blog, in my mind i think nobody is. so thank you for the kind words. i appreciate it.

i was in another craft fair over the weekend. i didn't do so well. two hats were sold. TWO. i was disappointed, but! i was also thankful for the compliments i received. retail is fickle and a lot of time i'm left wondering where my target market is in this city. i know my folks are out there. i do better at the hippie/reggae fests and i get a lot of business from out of state. anyway, i've spent the last couple of days analyzing and reworking my gameplan. i've got one more show dec. 1 and it will be me and only me (i've been sharing booth space with other artists). i'm feeling the pressure and really want to do well.

i got my hair wrapped while at the fair. my booth mate does beautiful wire work and i asked her to wrap my hair for me. we were both really happy with the results. i love adding charms to my locs. this piece is by far my favorite.

i really hope you are having a great day.
thanks for reading.

dear blog,

the clouds have cleared enough to let the sun shine through. he's already setting. soon it will be dark and i will be wishing to see the stars.

the weekend blessed me. blessed. me. i met the most beautiful women over the weekend. both are artists living off of their art. both are living full lives. both have left me thinking about my life, my dreams, my future. i will be 33 soon. things gotta change. that's all i know. i believe 2008 will be a huge year for me.

i've got visions dancing in my head. i wake up in the morning full of ideas. i can't contain them all. i guess it's time to put it all on paper (shoulda done that ages ago). it's time to start believing in my SELF.

i am looking forward to the three day weekend. lil miss will be in school on monday and i get to do whatever i want. i love days like that.

remix 11/7

remix 11/7
Originally uploaded by butta.fly

this is my outfit for today. i really love it...because 1. the majority of it i got from thrifting, and 2. i feel comfortable with my size.

since i began documenting my outfits, i've been more open to experimenting with different proportions. it's made me realize that i've put so many restrictions on myself without being aware of it.

i thrifted this skirt yesterday. i was so excited when i found it. it fits perfectly and came with a cute belt. i got the woven flats from ramona west on etsy (she sells vintage goods - the shoes are from the 70s).

five years ago i would've have thought this was an "old lady" outfit. but i see now that it comes down to fit and how i feel in an outfit. finding a good fit has been an issue for me for a while now and accepting my size has been another. i feel confident, sexy, and gosh darnit feminine ( i can't believe i said gosh darnit. lol).

it's a new day y'all.

meet carrot

carrot
Originally uploaded by butta.fly

adara wanted to show off her new friend. she named him mr. carrot yellow bunny. isn't that a great name?

i talked to my friend this morning and she told me that we won't be doing the craft fair this weekend. i was so relieved. it just dawned on me last night that the fair was THIS WEEKEND. i've made some things, but not much. turns out, she and our other friend are in the same boat. plus, money and personal issues are involved as well. so now i have a little more time to plan BETTER for the fair next weekend.

i'm looking forward to the holiday season to be over and done with. i realized earlier in the summer that if i plan on doing more than one fair a season, i gotta have TONS of product made. i'm figuring it all out though and i'm having fun in the process.

last night's dinner was spaghetti with "twisty noodles" (aka egg noodles in adara speak). i used smart grounds ground tvp and 2 cans of diced tomatoes with sweet onions & garlic and 1 can of tomato paste (i was out of sauce). it was real simple to make and the sweetness of the sauce added a little zing to the meal. i gotta include more veggies into my diet though. i've fallen off big time.

right now i'm:
learning to use the franklin-covey planner i got at the time management workshop i went to a couple of weeks ago.
playing with my style of dress. it's been a liberating experience so far (still have a long way to go).
learning how to take better photos. i don't have the best camera (it's so old), but i'm learning to use what i've got.

it's a beautiful day! (as adara would say)
enjoy!

working...

grnbrnsk
Originally uploaded by butta.fly

i'm in the middle of making hats and taking photos of my works to post in the shop.

i've been tagged

7 Random Facts! Here are the rules:
1. Link to the person that tagged you and post the rules on your blog
2. Share 7 random and/or weird facts about yourself
3. Tag 7 random people at the end of your post and include links to their blogs. Let each person know that they've been tagged by leaving a comment on their blog
I have been tagged by cici

1. when i was in the second grade, i was runner up in a spelling bee. i mispelled the word MINSTREL. i still have my silver medal.

2. i heart barbara streisand. i haven't seen all of her movies, but don't let the owl and the pussy cat or funny face be on. i go into a zone and will completely ignore you while i'm watching it.

3. i do not like people touching any new magazines i've bought UNTIL i've read them first.

4. i'm left handed.

5. i like eating my popcorn with parmasean cheese sprinkled on it. i used to fold american cheese slices into little strips and then individually wrap them around my popcorn. i stopped doing it because it became too time consuming.

6. i looooove eating pineapple slices out of a can. i don't do it often, but i feel like a rebel when i do. my mom used to always yell at me when i did it at home. when i got my first apartment, i ate my pineapple in peace, in my own kitchen, at 2AM! ha! in your face ma'! lol.

7. i bite my nails. when i'm not biting my nails, i'm picking at my fingers. it's an obsessive compulsive thing. once i start, i can't stop. it's a nasy habit and i'm able to kick it every once in a while. it comes down to stress and anxiety and i can usually guage how stressed or anxious i am by how bad my fingers look. ha! i once i had a guy that was interested in me tell me (after looking at my hands) that he likes his woman to have nice looking hands. i wasn't interested in him and said, "well, i'm not the woman for you then."

listening to: karma police. citizen cope from the radiodread compilation

last nite, i made the super-easy cheesy no-boil lasagna from vegweb. WOW! talk about cheesy goodness! it was my first time using a tofurky product and i was pleased. even lil miss loved it. we will probably be eating this the whole weekend.

my first show is the 9th-11th. i gotta get crackin' on the knitting and crocheting. i still feel like there aren't enough hours in the day (with school added to the mix). i also need to get some more stuff added in the store. my goal for the month is to get 15 sales. gotta have product available to accomplish that goal.

i made the pledge to buy handmade this christmas season. i've been pretty much making my gifts for the last three years. but i will be buying some of the handmade gifts this time around. there are so many talented people on etsy, i gotta give some of them my support. i have to admit though, i've been a shopping fiend lately (etsy is da bomb!). it's just nice to have an outlet to get one of a kind, handmade, crafty goodness.

anyway, this weekend's activities will include doing some homework, knitting, crocheting, and taking lil miss to see the bee movie. i might do some thrifting too (something else i've (re)discovered).

enjoy the day!
love.

nwpinks5
Originally uploaded by butta.fly

this is one of the neckwarmers i made recently. i've got one more almost finished.

26/365
Originally uploaded by butta.fly

this is one of the neckwarmer/cowl things i've been making lately. you can wear it like a hood or around your neck. it definitely keeps the ears warm.

so i'm feeling a little better these days. i'm working on building up my confidence...figuring out how to love me and all of my flaws.>

this month, i've had four sales off of my etsy site. two of those were for custom orders. i'm putting some crazy energy out into the universe to sell lots at two upcoming craft fairs. so much needs to be done in the next two weeks. i can't believe this month is over already.

must order more labels. gotta find mannequin heads to use for displays. and i most definitely need to smile more! i haven't had a good laugh in a couple of weeks. it seems like an eternity.

creator, guide and protect me during these trying times.

oh by the way...lil miss is feeling better. my favorite part of the day is hearing about what she ate for lunch and snack at school. she gets really excited about it.

i was tagged by cici to post 7 random things about me. i will do that later on tonite.

listening to: insomnia.jill scott

i was able to get a little knitting done this weekend. i'm trying to use up my leftover yarn, so i made two neckwarmers. i'm hoping to have them in the shop by thursday.

lil miss had a crazy high fever on saturday. by sunday afternoon she was up running around and ready to hit the streets. she also three helpings of dinner. i was stunned. i need to learn more about homeopathic medicine because there's nothing worse than feeling helpless when your child is sick.

happy moonday. hope it's a good one.

master cleanse, day four: aaaaaaand i'm done.

i broke my fast around 6pm yesterday. i was terribly cold and overall felt like crap. i’m going to find a different detox to do. one that involves veggies and fruits.

i don't feel the urge to consume sweets and snacks. i'm a sugar junkie. today, i'm starting fresh.

we got some snow today. i was actually kinda happy about it.

tomorrow, i'm going to a time management workshop being hosted by franklin covey (dot com). i am really excited about because time management is something i'm not that great with.

the week is almost over. woo! has it been good to you so far?

still listening to: madlib!

master cleanse, day three: my day started off okay and then i got real grumpy around lunch time. i started to question why i was doing this in the first place. i'm cool now, but i'm tired. i would really like to take a nap, but i gotta head to class. i've got a midterm in one class. i'm not really looking forward to it, because i'm not prepared.

trying to be more mindful of my thoughts/words (it's hard though!).

more later.

i'm home from school. my day brightened up when i found out i got into my school's annual craft fair. bflyears is now in three shows for the holiday season. i've already exceeded my goals for the year. yeah!

listening to: enter...hot curry.madlib

i heart madlib. i got beat konducta vol 3 & 4: in india and i'm loving everything i'v heard so far.

master cleanse, day two: i got a late start on drinking the lemonade today. i had to go out today for a few hours and made enough lemonade to take with me. i think i’ve only had 4 glasses today.

i’ve got a lot of work to do tonite, but i’m exhausted. that’s one thing i’ve noticed while doing the cleanse. i’ll have a lot of energy during the day, but as soon as 7pm hits i’m tired. i will be going to bed early tonite.

i’m not really hungry and feel like i can do the full 10 days with no problem.

:::

while doing this cleanse, i plan on cleaning out everything in my environment - people, things, old habits, negative thinking, etc.

tomorrow's a new day. i'm looking forward to it.
hope your day was great. be blessed.

listening to: emcee murdah.k-os

today is day one of the master cleanse. i'm a little tired, but have spent the day catching up on housework. i hope to accomplish a lot during the next nine days.

listening to: lay me down.will.i.am f. terry dexter

i think i'm going to bake salmon for dinner tonite. lil miss loooooves salmon. i haven't really cooked much of anything in the last couple of days and i'm starting to feel like crap. when i cook, i feel like i've gained some type of control over my life. does that sound weird?

i'm going to start the master cleanse on saturday. it'll be my second time doing it. i was amazed at the results the last time and think it's necessary for the changing of the seasons.
:::
i've been feeling a little down. can't help but feel like i'm not doing a good job parenting my children. especially my oldest. that girl is putting me through it and it's only the beginning. it really sucks that i never had the necessary support from her father or his family. now the shit is hittin' the fan i'm the only one trying to do something about it. *sigh*

lil miss tells me almost everyday that i'm a good mom (which is always after i give her a banana, or raisins, or surprise her w/ a fruit roll up lol). i'm doing the best i can do. i know that.

a friend told me once, that no matter what happens, i gotta have beautiful days. i keep that with me.

anyway, i try not to get too personal on this spot, but i had to let that out.

have a beautiful day y'all.

it's not lookin' good outside. it's cold today and i walked out the door with no socks on. i'm bundled up otherwise. it's been an ass-backwards day, lemme tell ya.

weekend haps: HOMEWORK! i've gotten behind in my writing class. i gotta somehow fit knitting into the mix too, cuz i've got custom orders to complete. still trying to figure out how to balance everything (especially with craft shows & midterms coming soon).

wondering what lil miss and i are going to do. she is starting to notice the seasons changing. with fall/winter comes the longer periods of darkness. when we left the house this morning she said, "mom it's not wake up time yet! it's still bedtime!" i couldn't agree more. she's battling pink eye at the moment. it has spread from one eye to the other. how can you explain pink eye to a four year old? "get your hands outta your eyes and go wash your hands!" has become a mantra of sorts.

:::

i really need a pencil skirt in my life. a cute pair of boots would be nice too.

goodness is jerk tofu with kale greens. that's my lunch today and it's oh so yummy. jerk is my new favorite marinade. thanks j for bringing it into my life. so what i've been doing is marinading my tofu in a mix of jerk and worcestershire sauce. after about 30 minutes or so (sometimes a lot less depending on how hungry i am), i throw my tofu chunks on my george foreman grill. i then let it cook until it's nice and brown. then to add a little sweetness to all of the spice in the jerk, i drizzle honey on top. i can't get enough of the stuff.

i may make j's curry tofu tonite. now that's some heavenly goodness too.

is it fall in your neck of the woods yet?

i love green

meangreenscarf2
Originally uploaded by butta.fly

just added to the shop.

it's made with a mix of green yarns - celery, granny smith, dark khaki, and a brown heather. it's very warm and one of my fav-o-rites.

i did alright at the fair. i'm excited though because i met another single mama doing her thing. we talked about other shows and ways i could get my works out there. i'm very thankful i met her. anyway, the ladies i was sharing the booth with invited me to do the next fair with them (which is one of the big holiday fairs in town!). i gotta keep the momentum going ya know.

listening to: all i.jill scott

have a great day.
peace. love. blessings.

listening to: whenever you're around.jill scott

have you heard the new jill scott cd? i haven't listened to the whole thing, but so far i'm happy. you go jill.

it's been raining a lot. the snow is coming further and further down the mountains each day. soon, it'll be on the ground. we usually get our first dusting around halloween. i'm prepared though. i've got scarves and cowls (i really love making cowls-why hadn't i started sooner?).

the fair started today. two ladies i met at the forest fair invited me to add my wears to their booth. i'm so grateful to them. i had to work today and my babysitting situation didn't work out for the evening, so they have been selling my stuff for me. i gotta give them a little token of my appreciation. they said it was slow today, but tomorrow is going to be a killer. i'm looking forward to it.

once i leave work, i think i will hit some thrift stores. i gotta find a coat rack to display my scarves on. scarves are the hardest thing to display (in my opinion).

looks like the clouds are coming back. that means more rain. have a good weekend.

listening to: bigupradio.com

the craft fair starts tomorrow. i'm sorta freakin' out about it. it's my first holiday fair and it dawned on me that maybe i should have holiday decorations. maybe i should have gift bags or boxes to give with each purchase? it's funny cuz i'm not even into the holidays. i don't even think about christmas until a few days before. anyway, i don't think i'm really prepared but at this point all i can do is enjoy the experience.

it will work out. it always does.

i'm really excited about my business though. i just purchased my license, i'm advertising like crazy. THIS. IS. REAL. SHIT.

the business class i'm taking is helping a lot too. my professor is so dope (yes, i said dope). he talks about sun tzu's art of war all the time. BUSINESS IS WAR! IF YOU ARE GOING TO GET INTO BUSINESS, THEN BE PREPARED TO FIGHT! i just wanna jump and scream HELL YEAH!! this is a good time. i'm learning a lot about my SELF.

have a blessed day y'all.

favorites = inspiration

favorites = inspiration
Originally uploaded by butta.fly

my latest favorites from flickr...

i am really enjoying cooking these days. last nite, babygirl and i made falafel. we discovered lil miss likes hummus. she couldn't get enough of it. hummus has become my comfort food of choice. i spread it on toast and i'm in heaven.

etsy. i am completely addicted to the site. between reading the etsy forums and craft, inc, i'm beginning to think about my business differently. this is an exciting time! there are a couple of months left in the year and i'm going to make the most of it.

blessings.

today, i made veggie burgers using the recipe in vegan with a vengeance. it was GOOD.

yesterday, i bought more yarn at joann's. i'm cranking out stuff for the fair this week. i also bought some wonderful batik fabric to make a built by wendy dress. let's see how it goes. sewing clothes is uncharted territory for me.

hope you're day is going well. later.

listening to: give it to ya.jah cure

butta.fly wears now has an etsy shop. it's a work in progress, but i just had to stop making excuses and post something. i will be adding more items thru the rest of the week.

school is going okay. i had my first midterm yesterday. i also got praises from my teacher on an essay i wrote. it really surprised me because i thought i didn't have the format down (and i thought it was too short!). anyway, turns out the format was perfect. my friend told me i need to relax and trust myself. i totally agree.

butta.fly wears is doing an event the weekend of october 5. there will be another one in november.

guidance & protection.

i'm feeling light.
as in i believe i'm losing weight.
my mama says i'm losing my ass. i agree with her.
i was just starting to like it...my ass that is.
oh well.
it's been raining a lot here.
the clouds have been putting on a show.
the wind was blowing hard last nite.
i was trying to hear what she had to say.
i slept really well.
madvillian has to be my favoritest (yeah i said it) album.
i can't wait to pick up lil miss.
she always has the best days.

cowl2
Originally uploaded by butta.fly

i made a discovery. i like cowls. i have to make more of them and rock 'em this winter.

listening to: there is a way.mos def - there are two lines to the song. & the words have become my mantra:

1. there is a way, no matter what they say
2. don't give up, don't give in

this weekend, i plan on cranking out neckpieces (scarves, cowls, & whatever else i think of to keep your neck toasty).


be blessed.

listening to: cannot even (break free).the noisettes

fall is here. there's a chill in the air and the leaves had started to change colors. it's been raining a lot too.

i somehow managed to catch a cold so i haven't been a happy camper this week. i overslept this morn and i must have really needed that extra hour, because i felt great when i got up. so the nasty cold is on it's way out of my system. yesss!

one more day 'til the weekend starts.
hugs to you. bless.

things i currently love:
cooking with cumin & garlic
sharpie ultra fine point markers in every color of the rainbow!
enchanted valley farm hummus
jamaican mango & lime hair products
my local library - they had all of the most recent craft books plus a lot vintage stuff
thrifting
did i say enchanted valley farm hummus?!

sometimes i think i love food too much.

i'm thinking about doing the fall cure. my apartment would love me for it.

saul is coming back to anchorage!

listening: the noisettes!
reading: the awakening by kate chopin
watching: the secret
knitting: the placed cable aran sweater

i finished the back of the place cable aran. it's going to look fabulous when i'm done. knitting again has been a pure joy. i've got lots of projects lined up for the upcoming months (been thinking a lot about christmas presents). the seasons are changing (i can feel the chill in the air) so i've got sweaters and socks on my mind.

this weekend i went to see zion i, the grouch, charlie 2na, and jennifer johns perform. IT WAS AWESOME!! that show was so ridiculous, i danced for four hours straight. of course afterwards, i felt really old 'cause every joint in my body was hurting. lol! it definitely made me realize that i didn't have an 18 year old's body anymore. the show was definitely a blessing. a sista needed the release.

may your day be great.
love love.

listening to: rag & bone.white stripes

i've cut out the pieces for my first sewing project of the month. it's for the tote bag from simple sewing.

i had some extra time to kill after work last nite, so i went to jo-ann's and looked at their patterns. i really want a cute jumper dress or shift to wear during the fall.

i've gotta get to class. more later.

i'm restless. losing focus. that's changing tonite!!!

i'm knitting the placed cable sweater from the fall interweave knits. using wool-ease and LOVE. IT. this sweater is going to feel so good on. i can't wait to finish it.

hope your weekend was a good one. blessings.

listening to: down.amel larrieux

did you know that september is national sewing month? i've decided to take advantage and work on my sewing skills during that time. i've had several projects lined up for quite some time now. i can't wait to start.

i've been thinking a lot about clothing (and overconsumption and how to spend less money, etc) and how disposable it's become over the years. it seems like i can't have a shirt that doesn't have a hole in it after a couple of washings. ridiculous i say! not to mention, unacceptable. i deserve to have clothing that is made well. my children deserve to have clothing that is made well. i really want to hone my sewing skills so i can make my own clothes. my mama did it for the longest (i have memories of this amazing dress she made for my preschool graduation. i gotta find the pictures). i recently hemmed some jeans i bought and felt so empowered! i feel like a million bucks everytime i wear them.

a dream project of mine: make a pair of jeans that fit me p-e-r-f-e-c-t-l-y.

i feel a social experiment coming on. i'll keep you posted.

enjoy your weekend. hug a loved one (or a random person on a street!).
peace

listening to: the panties.mos def

one: my classes are filled with a bunch of 18 year olds.
two: my biz, b.flywears has gotten off to a good start. i've been getting continuous orders from ppl i met two months ago. i'm so happy about that, but at the same time i wonder when will i have time to make new stuff for the holidays (i'm doing two big holiday festivals in oct & nov.
three: yoga. i love it so much (when i do it). i've started practicing again. my calves and hips are a little sore today. i'm so dis.connected from my body. poses i love - warrior and all of it's variations, downward dog. poses that need work - child's and triangle.
four: lil miss told me she's "allergic of ppl". ain't that some isht?

hope your day is a good one.
peace.

listening to: possibly maybe.bjork

the minisweater/boobholder is complete. i pulled carla out of the closet and sewed her up (i hate the way she looks on me, but at least she's done now). now i'm making this. it's a pretty cool pattern and fairly simple to do. i think i'm going to make it two colors because i don't have another skein of yarn to complete it. i'm also trying to use what i already have.

my first day of class is tonite. i'm excited. this week will be about becoming organized. basically creating meal plans, cleaning up the house, and get to bed at a reasonable hour.

enjoy the day. give somebody a hug. they may need it.

blessings.

last nite, i held the most content baby. she was absolutely beautiful. i had forgotten what babies smell like. she had the softest hair and cooed everytime i spoke to her. i hope that the creator blesses me with one more. i really would love lil miss to have a younger sibling.

sigh.

listening to: southside.common f. kanyeezy!

i spent 20 minutes looking for a lone spool of red hemp twine. i'm in the process of completing a special order and was sweating bullets because i could not find the red twine. i finally found it. not in the bin marked hemp/cotton, but in a random bag filled w/ wool. ugggggghhhh!! the frustration of it all. i guess it's time to reorganize my yarn stash again.

since i was tearing my house up trying to find the hemp, i managed to pull out all of my unfinished projects. i'm determined to finish everything. some things have been sitting for 3-4 years and that's not acceptable.

currently in love with:
gaslamp killer's kobwebs (find him on myspace)
new old navy jeans that i hemmed myself (i felt so empowered after doing it!)
my sewing machine (we're getting to know each other well)
my late blooming zinnia's i planted back in june.

blessings, j

listening to: mirror in the sky.k-os

i feel betta today. i talked things out with a friend and i did some yoga. i love yoga. i'm committing myself to practicing three times a week.

listening to: cat diesel.k-os

stress. it's a bitch!

i'm going back to school and it starts next monday. i'm registered and ready to go but have some financial aid issues to work out. *sigh* my kids are driving me crazy...lil miss is in this whining/bossy stage that i can't stand and babygirl? don't get me started with her. she's a teen. i'll leave it at that.

calgon, take me away. PLEASE!

i got my ravelry invite and it came right on time. since being apart of the community, my want need to knit has returned. i haven't done any knitting in quite some time and now i want to complete all of my unfinished projects. i'm 95% done with the minisweater/boobholder and i have a few more projects lined up after i'm done.

i realized last nite that i just have to knit. i do. it's the one thing that brings any sort of peace in my life. pictures to come in a week or so. a sista is without an internet connection at home. *sigh!!*

blessed love.

looks like the rain has stopped. i've been thinking about what i'm going to cook for dinner tonite. i've decided on tomtato soup and grilled cheese sammiches. it's perfect for this weather and will rid me of the chills i've been having all day. fall is right around the corner.

i'm looking forward to the upcoming season, but a little sad because i don't have time to make myself any new wooly goodness to wear. lil miss will be getting a new sweater though (i'm so behind on making her stuff).

ooh! looks like the sun is trying to come out. i'm going home.

listening to: friend of mine.lily allen

i've lost two more pounds. that brings the total to 8lbs. lost. wow! it really amazes me how just cutting out junkfood makes a difference.

listening to: i want you.common

i still have a lot of thoughts running thru my head. the main thing i guess is being healthy. healthy physically, mentally, and spiritually. i've been thinking about opening up queen afua's sacred woman and really sit down and work on the exercises she provides. i feel healing my womb to be essential at this point. i want to be as strong as possible. to the few of you that read this blog...have you read sacred woman? did you do the work involved? what are your thoughts on it?

listening to: smooth my heart.cree summer

i've got so much inside me right now. i feel like i'm going to explode.

today, i reclaim my power.
i am beautiful. i am lovable. i deserve all blessings the most high bestows upon me. most definitely.

i got some sun on saturday. my skin is glowing.

today i reclaim my body.
i go back and forth between eating right and consuming a bunch of junk. i definitely SEE the difference in how i deal with things physically & mentally after i've eaten a bunch of junk. i found this quote today on omidele's blog...

do you love who you want to be enough to give up who you are?

heavy, right?


my thoughts are moving in a 1000 directions at the moment. i'll continue this later.

have a wonderful day.
love & light.

my latest favorites

my latest favorites
Originally uploaded by butta.fly

color is an inspiration these days.

porch4
Originally uploaded by butta.fly

my little girl brings so much laughter to my life. she coaxed me out of the house to inspect our raspberry bush for ripe raspberries (we found some and they were yummy btw). we ended up staying outside for a while and i took some pics.

bedtime
Originally uploaded by butta.fly

she's my partner. mos' definitely.

listening to: misunderstood.common

i am:
seriously craving a new tattoo.
tired.
thinking about him.
wishing i could be home.
really lovin' common's new cd.
ready to go back to girdwood.
tired.

listening to: comin' for you.davina

the sun is shining. i think i may take lil miss to the park tonite. i don't do that as much as i should. it's chilly in the mornings. all i can think is...summer's almost over.

i'm tired. been talkin' to vendors on the phone all day.

have a good one.

listening to: u black, maybe.common

today, i was reminded that i'm on the right path. for that, i am thankful.

listening to: we can be new.amel larrieux

"i want somebody to walk up behind me and kiss me on my neck"-erykah badu

last nite i sat up thinking about where my special someone was. is he out there? i really love the place i'm in...single and being a mom. but at some point i would like to be in a loving, supportive relationship with an awesome man (i've been saying awesome a lot lately). i want 45 yrs of wedded bliss like my moms and daddy.

last nite was one of those nites where i wished i had a pair of strong arms wrapped around me & my lion telling me about his day.

one day.

the new common cd is pretty decent. i'm enjoying it a lot more than 'be'.

listening to: start the show.common

the reggaefest was a huge success! i had an amazing time and met some wonderful people. i can't really put the whole experience into words. but i felt/feel so blessed. the day was definitely blessed! the wailers rocked it and was almost left with no inventory. the next fair is next weekend and i have 7 hats to make this week (got some custom orders) and then i have a week to replenish my inventory. i'm going to be busy.

babygirl sold two hats and a scarf. she's working on some things for the next fair. i am totally amazed by my daughter's talent. everytime she shows me something she's working on, i feel like crying. she's 14 and her skills will only keep progressing. i'm very thankful for my girls.

man, have a great day. i mean it.
love.

listening to: gaia.rachelle ferrell & jonathan butler

i finally own a pair of red shoes. they are so cute, so fabulous, and i can't forget to mention comfortable. i've never been into flats, but i couldn't resist these. now i need to buy a new pair of jeans to wear with them.

i'm driving back to girdwood tomorrow nite to set up my booth. have i done what's necessary to prepare? of course not. i have to load up my truck tonite, so there's tons to do when i get off of work. i'm making a list so i don't forget anything.

listening to: lady.d'angelo

i really need to stay out of joann's. their yarn selection has gotten a lot better than wal-mart's (and the colors are fantastic!).

anyway, the reggaefest is this saturday and i haven't really done anything to prepare. so i will stop bs'n and get focused on my biz.

it's been raining the last few days. i'm so thankful for the rain. it gives my sinuses a break (allergies are still kickin' my ass).

well, that's enuff for now. enjoy the day.

listening to: second to think.saul williams

i got a massage today.
there is so much built up
pain & stress in my body.
it makes me sad.
i've been in a state of reflection
since i walked out of that office.

i'm cool. really.
just have a lot of stuff to do.
i'm hustlin. butta.fly wears will have
a booth at the reggaefest next saturday.
i'll be back in girdwood. this time
lil miss will be with us.

currently working on glampyre's minisweater.
i'm also spinning. i take a few minutes each day to
practice. i think i'm getting betta.

enjoy the day.

listening to: miles davis kind of blue.npr's jazz profiles podcast

my tummy hurts. my back does too. i was reunited with my very first chiropractor on monday. he's awesome! but after seeing him three days this week, my poor back is in so much discomfort (my discomfort than pain). he tells me to say, "i welcome the adjustment" cuz i'm always complaining and whining after every "back-crack". he's right i guess. i am trying to live in a state of positivity.

anyway, i went to a new yarn store last nite. saw my new friend jacquie and got my spinning lesson. i was kickin' major ass!!! i can use my wheel now! turns out jacquie has the same wheel so she was able to show me how to set it up and tell me what i was missing. meeting her has definitely been a blessing. i am so thankful.

i really want to knit something special just for me. i realized last nite that i haven't knit or crocheted much in a very long time. i picked up the new knitscene and want to knit a few sweaters. i also started back to knitting cookie a's pomatomus. i just wanna challenge myself more with my knitting (and crocheting).

i'm off to lunch with a friend. enjoy the day.
blessings.

just finished lunch...my new favorite sammich is *drumroll pleez*



roasted red pepper hummus with lettuce, tomato (lil miss tells me it's pronounced toe-motto), avocado, red pepper, onion, cheese, and cucumber.

wow!!

listening to - karma police.citizen cope on easy dread all-stars cd

i am seriously craving chili right now. i don't know why really. i found a recipe on vegweb (big ups to vegweb!!)that i think i'm going to try tonite.

i had such a great time at the fair. i instantly bonded with anutha name jacquie (she spells her name differently from mine) who spins, knits, and dyes. she can basically teach me everything i need to learn to start my little cottage industry. i bought a drop spindle from her 11 yo daughter kaitlin. kaitlin gave me a quick spinning lesson and i was hooked. i forgot to bring a knitting project to the fair so i ended up buying some roving from anutha vendor and i spun the whole weekend. tonite, jacquie is going to give me a lesson on my wheel. I AM SO EXCITED! i will take pictures tonite of my spindle and spinning works and all the other goodies i got.

take time to breathe. AND make sure you enjoy the day!
blessings.

booth5

booth5
Originally uploaded by butta.fly

i survived anutha forest fair. this year was definitely a success!! i'm so happy/pleased/excited.

i have to learn how to shift gears and go back into the mama/housekeeping mode. that's funny to me...trying to balance work with raising a family and keeping house.

anyway, i'm glad to be home and in my bed (i camped out while in girdwood).

before i forget: listening to-dublab.com podcast .frosty's bollywood blast

listening to: stones throw podcast.j-rocc's madlib remixes

there are two more days until i make the drive the girdwood and set up my booth. i'm very excited and can't wait to spend some time in the woods.

this weekend was spent getting to know my sewing machine. i didn't get much sewing done, but i did figure out how to oil the maching and clean the feeder dogs. i'm going to be a sewing fool very, very soon.

i really want to set up a sewing area in a corner of my living room. so i'm on a mission to find a sewing table. at the moment, i sew standing up. why? because my dining room table is too high and sitting on a couple of phone books isn't good for my back. standing isn't good for my back either, but it is the better alternative.

so for you sewers out there, are sewing tables generally expensive? is there another alternative? can i make my own?

i'm currently knitting another cable beanie. this one is going to babygirl.

happy monday. peace.

it was a beautious day.

21
Originally uploaded by butta.fly.

thinking about my next move.

listening to: fugee-la (sly & robbie rmx).the fugees

every morning i wake up to my fugees cd playing. the funny thing is, i've been having crazy dreams w/ lauryn, wyclef, and even john forte in them. this morning, john was in my dream spittin his lyrics to me. i always wake up laughing.

anyhoo...hayfever has been kickin my ass this summer. all i want to do is breathe with no restriction and have eyes that aren't itchy. i look so crazy in the morning, but i've been having the best sleep ever. i found some natural remedies online that's supposed to help relieve the discomfort of it all. so far, so good. remedies include drinking chamomile and/or dandelion root tea (dandelion root tea cleans the liver), eating lots of dark leafy greens, getting lots of vitamin c and beta-carotene, don't consume sugar/dairy (which has been a little difficult). i've been a carrot juice making fool this past week. i've also been using a neti pot to cleanse my sinuses. it really works and i always feel so much better after using it.

speaking of juice...i am in love with my new jucier. i made my first green juice yesterday. it was made with kale, celery, and my one lonely apple. i had a little this morn and it wasn't bad. i know i will have to upgrade my juicer soon, because i can easily see me wearing it out before too long (making carrot juice stresses out the motor).

i feel empowered.

i'm selling my goods at the forest fair next weekend. i'll be spending four days in the woods with the mosquitoes, mud, and cottonwood (hay fever will be in overdrive!). i'm not much into camping, but i always have such a good time when i go to girdwood.

the sun is shining, the weather is awesome, AND it's friday!!! have a blessed day y'all.

love.

listening to: back to black.amy winehouse

afghan
Originally uploaded by butta.fly.

this is a blanket i started when i first moved into my current apartment (almost 3 yrs ago). i figured i deserved a house warming present and an afghan (since i've always given my afghans away and never kept one for myself). anyway, it's looking really great. it's all made from my little bits of scrap yarn i've had leftover. i'm coming close to finishing (making it queen size). it should be done right in time for winter.

listening to: the 6th sense.common ft. bilal

my little girl turned 4 yesterday. 4. she's been waiting to turn 4 all month. ppl would ask, "adara, when's your birthday?" "JUNE!". when she found out it was june, she got really excited and was like, "mom it's my birthday?!" i'd disappoint her time and time again when i'd tell her "not yet."

i bought her a cake with a princess on it (and her frog prince i guess). i caught her looking at it yesterday and she said, "mom, you're a good mom. thank you for buying my cake."

i'm very thankful to have her in my life. she's full of light and love. she's my beautiful joy.

jocelyn_2

jocelyn_2
Originally uploaded by butta.fly.

she's 14 now. i can't believe it.

14

14
Originally uploaded by butta.fly.

watch out now.

listening: easy dread compilation

i'm having one of those days. the sun is shining and all i wanna do is get in my mumu and walk around my backyard barefoot. i'm trying my hand and gardening. container gardening to be exact. i didn't think about how expensive it'd be to buy flowers. so i started some from seeds. the first go 'round my herbs got roasted in the sun. then i planted some flowers and they started sprouting. my daddy knocked that pot over when he was cutting the grass. they seem to be doing okay, but we'll see.

i'm in this crazy nesting phase. doing my best to finally add some of my personality to my apartment. i've been living in this place almost three years and just started to feel at home there. i started with my bedroom by hanging up a tapestry and added some plants (they were moved from downstairs because they weren't getting enuff light). it's amazing how plants change the energy in a room. my room feels so different. more cozy and inviting. thiniking about making a duvet cover and pillow shams (using patterns from Lotta Jansdotter's Simple Sewing)

new loves:

my new juicer
being meat free (recently got back on the wagon)br> experimenting with new veggie recipes (vegweb rocks)
feeling more comfy in my skin
etsy.com

listening to: miss you.bjork

i'm definitely feeling god's energy these days. everywhere i look i'm grateful for the opportunity to look upon his creation.

summer here has had a few false starts. the other day it was 75 degrees. my body was in shock from the heat (i hate being in a hot house), but i've been craving the high temps ever since. stop teasing me mother nature!

going to work is hard. i definitely need to find another career that will feed my soul. today's a day i wish i had my notebook.

i'm currently wishing i could spend the whole summer in d.c. i miss my friends.

new loves:
my salad spinner
roasted eggplant
bjork (i've been sleepin', i know)
black nail polish

may your day be filled with smiles.
love.

listening to: baby i'm a star.prince

hellloooo. i'm still alive. since my last post, i've managed to work on(and damn near complete) my yarn scrap afghan, and i've finished two 9 patch washcloths(scroll down a bit).

everything is blossoming. my tulips look fabulous. and lil miss is coming up on her fourth birthday. i gotta get some pictures on this mug.

happy thurday.

listening to: some unholy war.amy winehouse

i'm blocked...again! there are several things going on in my life at the moment where i'm just exhausted emotionally and mentally. i can't help but think that as an artist i should be able to create regardless of what state i'm in. time and time again that idea has been proved wrong. i'll get thru this, but until then i guess i'm chillin.

cookie a. is the shit!

listening to: knock 'em out.lily allen

can you believe how fast the months are flying by?! i can't. every year the months fly by and i always seem to forget that i don't care for the month of march. why? because this town is still covered in snow and ice and it's usually hella cold. it used to drive me crazy when i was younger to watch mtv's spring break and see all the kids dancing on a beach, in their swimsuits.

one thing i am loving though is all the extra sunlight we've been getting. i love the sun!! i seem to forget that too.

there's two weeks until my event. can i just say that i'm a little stressed? when i do these events, i always wonder if i have enough merchandise and if ppl will like my stuff. it always turns out okay in the end though. i gotta chill out!

since it's been so cold lately, i made a pot of soup. it turned out great. i think i'm going to be making soups a lot more.

i have finished a pair of socks that's been sitting for 3 years. i am now working on the broadripple socks from knitty.

new hat

bluecable
Originally uploaded by butta.fly.

another to add to the pile. i'm beginning to like how my knitted hats look.

listening: the all golden fronts.nobody

so, the days are getting longer. that just means that we are blessed with more and more sunlight. i recently realized that the sun plays a huge part on my state of mind. i love the sun. i love seeing the sunlight bounce off of the white walls in my bedroom. i love waking up to the sun. soon the snow will melt and new life will spring forth. i can't wait!!!

my hands are jacked up. i knit one hat yesterday and i woke up to puffy hands and tired arms. i'm out of practice. i really didn't knit or crochet much in '06. so now my hands need reconditioning.

i'm off today and plan on doing some cleaning and of course...some knitting. i gotta make the most of my day.

blessings.

listening: there is a way.mos def

hats Originally uploaded by butta.fly.

i've been busily working on building my inventory for an event that's coming up at the end of march. i'm really excited about it.

i've already burned myself out once trying to meet my weekly "quotas". i gotta learn how to pace myself during this process.

the days are getting longer and that makes me so happy.

fitted_knits

fitted_knits
Originally uploaded by butta.fly.

i was so excited to get stefanie's book in the mail. i love this book! this book has me wanting to knit again ( i haven't knit any garments in quite some time).

some days
i miss your face
& your smile
& your smell

listening: turiyah and ramakrishna.alice coltrane (r.i.p.)

this month's focus has been about managing my time better. still working on developing morning and evening routines...feels like a neverending process.

i'm creating on a regular basis now. that hasn't happened since before i became pregnant with my little one. it feels good and i'm striving to achieve goals for myself. i'm going to be selling my wears at an event in march. it's been a while since i've sold anything or even thought about starting my business again. i've got a lot of things planned for this year. it's only the beginning.

shout out to all my friends who are going after their dreams. your hard work inspires and motivates.

listening: i need love.robin thicke

that song is so...ummm. it's nice.

the day has been somewhat productive. i got up early and saw my chiropractor (yes! napoleon dynamite stylee) then had lunch with a friend (if ya ever in anchorage, check out club paris. good eats man). i came home and cleaned my kitchen. i'm feeling the urge to cook a little something, but i'm not sure what.

just put the little one to bed and man it was not easy. she's at a stage i'm so not feeling...whining and crying for every. little. thing. hopefully, she'll sleep peacefully. that's something i pray for every nite.

i think i'm going to watch a flick or two and give myself a pedicure. i'm just gonna lounge (and do some knitting in meantime) and let robin sing to me some more.

must. knit. more. socks.

random thoughts

-i need to see my chiropractor...like yesterday. i've been stretching and doing yoga hoping the knot in my back will work its way out. so far it's not happening.

-2006. what a blur. i do know that i ended the year a different person. i've learned a lot about my self.

-2007 is all about getting my "sexy" on. re.discovering my woman self is in full effect. i'm having fun playing with my wardrobe. i might even flirt a little in the process. i really don't know how to talk to men. i can be a real goof sometimes.

- i need to connect more with people.

- i also need to take more time to update this blog on a regular basis.

- chivalry is not dead.

happy new year!

scarf3, originally uploaded by butta.fly.

this is another danica scarf. i made one for my daddy last christmas and have finally made one for myself. the colors in it make me happy.



i've been doing a lot of reflecting and overall 2006 was a decent year. i'm going to make 2007 even better and use the lessons i've learned over the last 12 months to get me through.



hope your new year got off to a great start.
peace.