listening to: liberation.outkast

i've got color schemes in my head. i'm putting madd energy out into the universe-i will get that apartment. i can't wait to decorate my new space. my office moved to a new location this week and i now have my very own office (i got a door!) to decorate. i really want to make it reflect me, but i also want it to be peaceful. it will be my refuge when folks are workin' my nerves. ha!

i just purchased some beautiful notecards from essimar. i think i will frame them and hang them up. i love her use of color (i'm not afraid of color or bold prints) and her paper animals are pretty dope too.

so i've got color schemes in my head. wool in my hands. my eyes to the stars.

goodnite.

i'm feeling extremely grateful today. the rain keeps falling so that means i will keep playing with wool.

hug someone today!

i saw an apartment today. it's a 4-plex that faces a wooded area. the owner said that they get visited by moose and even some bears (bears seem to be more and more common on my side of town). i'm very excited about that. i love my animals and i especially love nature. the apartment itself was really cute. it's a lot smaller than what i had, but i realize that i probably won't find a two bedroom apartment as big and roomy as the three bedroom i had.  plus there's nothing wrong with downsizing.  i will just have to release some stuff and that's never a bad thing.  

i was roaming etsy recently and found the perfect butterfly necklace.



it's hand-tooled leather and is made by sunny rising. please check out this sista's stuff. her flower and koi necklaces look so real. there is so much talent oozing from this woman. she also has a blog.

have a great nite.
peace.

my hands hurt. i've been knitting for the last two hours. there's a fair coming up in 3 weeks i've decided to particpate in it at the last minute. so i'm making some new stuff for it. i never feel ready for these things. even up until the few minutes the fair is open, i worry about not having enough stuff. pre-show jitters...i hate them.

anyway, the sun has been on hiatus and it really feels like we won't have a real summer. it feels like fall most days and i want to break out my scarves. but who knows, maybe our summer will start a little late and winter will be delayed? i'm just rambling. i got a lot on my brain and should probably go to bed.

my office is moving to a new space so the whole week i will be packing. we are getting friday off so the movers can come in and do their thing. my day is already planned - a massage in the morning and then the lunchtime yoga class i've been telling myself i'm going to take for months now. i may even go back to the spinning/weaving studio and buy some more roving.

well, i'm off to bed.
goodnight.

listening to: fellowship.meshell n'degeocello



so here's the fruit of my spinning labor. there are lots of thick and thin parts (which i like) and the thin parts have way too much twist in them. it's all a learning process right? i'm going to buy some more fiber so i can have enough yarn to make a neckwarmer.

not a lot is going on this weekend. i have an order to get out in the mail and i must finish the cotton scarf i've been working on for a week now.

hope your weekend is a good one.

i had an itch to spin the other day. my wheel is in storage and i couldn't find my spindle. so what did i do? i found a spinning and weaving studio and almost went nuts with all the toys and fibery goodness that was there. i was good though and only bought what i needed.

new spindle


merino roving


merino spun up


i finished spinning the merino last nite. i soaked them in warm water to set the twist. it's drying now, but when i look at it one word comes to mind, "ugly". lol. it's really not that bad. i realize that i'm a beginner and there is lots to learn. i will be paying a visit to the library to check out some books on the subject (will be watching a lot of youtube vids too).

my mama had a fish fry. the regular crew came by and spent the day with us. it was lovely. it didn't rain like the weatherman said it would. instead the clouds parted and we had lots of sun and it got really hot. my daughter said it was 75 degrees. we were all on the patio and i fell asleep on the lounger listening to my mama and her friends gossip. that type of stuff brings back childhood memories.

it was a splendid day.

i've been thinking about summer...and fall too. basically, what types of things to create for the late summer, early fall seasons.

i went to michael's and was compelled to buy crochet thread. thought a nice scarf/wrap would be nice. so i cast on 90 stitches on a size 9 needle. 20 rows into it and i'm like, "what the fuck am i doing?" it's going to take FOR. EVER. although the fabric feels absolutely amazing, i will be ripping that baby out. i will probably start over with a size 11 needle, double the thread up, and cut the amount of stitches by half.

stay tuned.

everyday i wonder how much more i can take. on most days i feel: suffocated, beat down, hopeless, tired, and unsure. but then i'll see two swallows playing with each other while in flight or hear my daughter's laugh and i feel better.

but really though. when will the financial struggle end? the next several months will prove to be difficult. i will be working my full-time job, going to school, and possibly be working a part-time job (in addition to being creative and selling my works?) now i realize there are single mamas out there doing that and then some, but i just wonder how? it seems impossible.

i'm learning to breathe. i'm taking deep breaths to help ease the panic. i'm praying. i give thanks and take time out to appreciate the things around me.

it's gonna get better. it just has to.